Latest Funny Jokes 2017

Why boys get blocked on Fb:

BOy: What's your name ?
Girl : Palak & ?
BOy : paneer
Blocked!!!

Girl : Whts Up?
BOy : Uttar pradesh
Blocked!!!

Girl : Have a gud day
Boy : No Thank u I like Parle-G More
Blocked!!!

Boy : Thank u
Girl : My pleasure
boy : My bajaj pulsar
Blocked!!!

                                                                                                 

CLASSIC..
just j eNjoyyyy..
Two Old ladies smoking
CAMEL brand cigrettes..
When it starts raining,,
1 lady pulls out a condom,,
cuts off the end,,
puts it over her cigarette
and continues smoking !
2nd lady : What's that ?
1st lady : Condom
this way my cigrette
doesn't get wet !
Next day the 2nd lady
goes to the chemist
and asks for condom..
The Chemist looks at her
strangely (she's over 80 yrs).. but politely asks
what brand she prefers !
Lady : It doesn't matter
as long as it fits the Camel !
Chemist fainted..

                                                                                                  

                                                       

 

                                

                                                                                                        

😜😜😜

बच्चा जब पैदा होता है
तो माँ उसके सर पे हाथ फेरती है
तो बाल बढना चालू होते हैं
और
शादी के बाद बीबी सर पे हाथ फेरती है
तो बाल उड़ना चालू हो जाते हैं...
प्रभु तेरी माया
कोई समझ नहीं पाया

😝😝

                                                                                                        

An Engineer went to Police Station for
filing report for his missing wife.

Engineer : I lost my wife, Misty. She went for shopping and still not reached home yet.

Inspector: What is her height ?

Engineer: I never noticed.

Inspector: Slim or healthy ?

Engineer: Not slim can be healthy.

Inspector: Colour of eyes ?

Engineer: Never noticed

Inspector: Colour of hair ?

Engineer: Changes according to season.

Inspector: What was she wearing ?

Engineer: Saree/suit/ I don’t remember exactly.

Inspector : Was she going in a car ?

Engineer: yes !

Inspector : Tell me the number, name and color of the car.

Engineer: Black Audi A8 with supercharged 3.0 liter V6 engine generating 333 horse power teamed with an eight-speed tiptronic automatic transmission with manual mode.
And it has full LED
headlights, which use light emitting diodes for all light functions and has a very thin scratch on the front left door
…. And
then the engineer started crying…..

Inspector: Don't worry sir, hum gaadi dhoond lenge.

                                                                                                    

                                                           

                                                                                                      

                                                        

                                                                                                

Teacher: Why are u late ?
Student: There was a man who lost his 1000 Rs note...
Teacher: Well that's nice ! Did u help him look for it
Student: Nope I was standing on it :-P

                                                                                                      

गुदगुदे . एक काला और एक सफ़ेद मोजा पहनकर स्कूल गया
.
टीचर : घर जाओ और
मोज़े बदलकर आओ।
.
गुदगुदे : कोई फायदा नहीं
सर वहां भी एक काला और एक सफ़ेद है।

😝😝😝😝😝😝😝